When I put Dinah to bed tonight she asked me, “Mom, what if vampires were real?” So, I told her “that would be crazy. American vampires would be really fat and lazy. They would watch shows about being a vampire and then run to the local McBloody’s and pick up a pint or two.” She laughed even though my response was a little over her head- as she usually does-then, asked “McBloody’s? blood? Why?” So, I was forced to explain that vampires drink blood (which I thought she already knew because I know she’s aware of the fangs and, well… what else would they be for?) So, I then told her she had an undesirable blood type so, if vamipres were real they wouldn’t “vant to suk her blooud. mu ha hahah ah.” She laughed and all was well in paradise again. But it got me to thinking, what if they were real and able to live openly in society? Its pretty funny if you think about it. There would be commercials for blood stain remover… Call now and get two for the price of one. Special Tupperware that didn’t stain when you stored your leftover McBloody’s in it. Us common folk would buy it too and use it for spaghetti sauce. Dentists could specialize in caring for fangs and 4 out of 5 of them would recommend fang-o-dent toothpaste. Those curtains that block out the sun would FLY off the shelves. Vampires could get a special permit to have their windows tinted much darker than the law currently allows. There would be a hearse like model of every make of car readily available right on the lot. Oh, the list goes on and on…. but for now I shall cease and hit the hay. Speaking of hitting the hay… I guess the price of a coffin would go up even farther as the demand would rise. Or maybe there would be a place called Mad Max’s Deep Discount Coffins where you could go to get a crappy uncomfortable coffin for the low low price of $99.95… coffin stand included. Mad Max wouldn’t do very well under that name though; so, he’d be forced to “go out of business” and re-open under a slightly different but conveniently similar name such as Mad Max’s Fine Coffins.
enough of that… good night.
see…now, I had high hopes when I saw Count Chocula up here, but, alas, I was sorely disappointed.
and boy do you have one weird kid (probably 2 weird kids, but I digress). Vampires make her laugh, but gaugeneyes (sp?) have her quaking in fear? pfft.